"I am but a small pencil in the hands of a great writer." Mother Teresa

This is my new motto I am trying to live, and it is HARD!!! I am not very good as sitting and waiting for direction. to listening for guidance, I am a do-er, not a sitter!!! I have found though, more and more lately, that my doing just takes me in circles, so maybe sitting and waiting and listening is not such a bad plan. I really want to do this though, I want to be an instrument of change, in how ever small a way I can be. I know that there are plans that have been made for me, and my family, that if I listen closely I can hear as a whisper above all the noise and chatter of life. I KNOW that this plan includes another adoption, I have seen this baby, but now I just need to wait and let God whisper in my ear the when and the how. I know God plans for our family to become more involved in our church, to help others in need to show our appreciation for the gifts we have been blessed with, possibly to travel on a mission trip to Africa with our church as well. These things I know, I am just waiting for the whisper in my ear to direct me and show me the way it will happen.
I have been somewhat at ease with the whole temp. unemployment, it was scary at first, but I know it will all work out in the end. I see that God has offered me the chance to be with my kids more, to work on teaching them more intensively so that they may grow and develop more into the wonderful people they are becoming. This is a golden moment, and I do not want to fight it, we will survive, even if we eat PB&J every lunch, and rice every other day(not truly that dire I promise!), I want to savor this time to really be with my kids and hubby, to really learn with them and from them about God's grace and glory, to follow His lead in this matter.
I am certain I will never be an instrument of large, monumental changes, but if I can change the lives of my kids, well maybe they can be the instruments of larger changes, and then I will have completed my purpose and that is the most I think any person can ask for. That was the message this week in church, that no matter who you are you have a purpose on the earth, God has a plan, and you just need to let Him guide you and it will be fulfilled. Not every purpose is large and dramatic, but they all matter and have a place, I believe that mine is to raise my children, teach them to love God and to follow his will, not blindly, but with determination and purpose. So for the coming year I have resolved to listen more, and be the pencil in His hand.
Okay that is the end of my sermon today, love and hugs to all Jamie