family and what it really means

Family is a great, and sometimes aggravating thing. I love my family, but some times they can really grate on my nerves. And they always have need of my time, ideas, ladders, listening ear or anyother resource I have. At the same time they also give their time, resources and love unconditionally, and listen even when they do not want to. I love my family, and know how truly blessed I am to have them in my life.
Sadly I have learned the hard way that family is not forever, I lost my grandmother when I was in my early teens, I loved her very much and mourn her still, not a week passes that I do not think of her and her gifts to me. I lost another grandfather and then my very favorite person in the world, my Grandpa Hal while I was in college. I mourn him and miss him all of the time, I miss his gentle spirit and strive to live up to his vision of me.
I have just recently lost another grandfather, Ralph was a new addition to my family, he is my stepfather Eric's dad, and Julianna's Grandpa Ralph. Ralph loved being a great grandpa, he loved children of all ages, races, and disabilities. He was a very dedicated man who collected stuffed toys for the police to give to children, he drove miles collecting can tabs, and had lots of little old ladies take their talent for knitting while they gossip and turned them to making hats and booties for babies in the local hospitals. Julianna has many small pairs of these hat sets, and many young children in Ethiopia will also wear his generosity and love when we take the last batch he was to receive with us to the orphanage, just as Ralph had requested we do many months back. Ralph loved to tell stories, he had done many things in his long life, but he loved most to tell stories about his own kids, and all the other children he had helped guide and assist in any way he could, he tried to father all of us, Jon and I included. He was a wonderful man and will be missed by his many friends, family, and grandchildren, I am honored to be included in that number and to claim his as my own family.
My relationship with Ralph typifies what family is to me. We chose to consider eachother family, but we both accepted the role and responsibility as gracefully as we knew how. I was a willing ear and a questioning nature that he could feel helpful to, and he provided any assistance and wisdom he had gleaned through the years. We both worked in our own way to make our family realtionship work, not conciously, but we worked at it just the same.
I have the same relationship with my inlaws and extended family. With them it is different though, we are more closely bound, but I am never sure that they have a real concept of the loss they would suffer if one of them were to fall ill or be in an accident and be killed. Noone in Jon's immediate family has died, Jon has grandparents, parents, brother and siste-in-law,aunts uncles, and cousins. They are all well and will likely remain so for a long time(God willing) so they have not suffered a loss, and at times take their relationship for granted, and are at times unwilling to put in the time and effort and work at their family bonds. For those family who are reading this and yelling at the computer, I am sorry if this upsets you, and I would save you from the heart ache this future loss will bring, but allowing small things to keep you from making time will make your loss harder and your wasted time more foolish.
Noone lives forever and time is passing so quickly. Family really menas loving eachother, and being bound, both by choice and sometimes by blood. Family is accepting eachothers habits, mistakes, and foolishness, and finding a way to love despite them. Family is all important, and I intend to hold tight the one I have and the one Jon and I are making, they are my life, and my greatest love, they are wonderful!!
with all my love Jamie